DANCE IT OUT!

Friday, April 6, 2007

Thankyou for keeping me accompany the whole of last night.
Though I guess you didn't know, and you probably will never see this, but your msges cheer me up.
I want to know you better.
I've been dying to ask you, who exactly you are.

Perhaps its better if I don't care,
Cause maybe I don't mean anything to you.
But I just want to let yknow,
I'm really tired of doing things for you.
And now, when I find that I don't actually mean anything to you,
I don't want to keep on crying for the sake of youand worry for you each night.
Now that you've got others to care, to worried for,
Then let it be this way.

I cried last night,
And wanted to know what have I been really doing.
I dislike you for not appreciating me at all, and which I feel real lost in you.
Do I don't mean anything to you.
I've been trying means and ways just to make you at least don't feel that you are all alone,
And produce noise which even I find it irritating,
And I wish to tell you,
I'll love you always and be there for you.
But I know and I guess, You don't even need me now, since you have got lots of others.
And which if I only care too much, I don't see why you can't tell and instead I'll be the one who will be always worrying and crying for you
And a Punching Bag to let you to vent everything about.
And maybe the previous conversation to me meant nothing at all to you,
But It Seriously Did Kill My Heart.
And I utterly won't forget what you said: Whatever I've explain is always the same shitthing, you had enough of my pangsai stuffs.
I won't explain anymore. I won't tell you things anymore.
And I'm sorry to ruined your day ytd, Or even to start everything which you didn't even bother to know/hear what I've got to say, and you said its my fault when I quarreled with Val.
Yknow when I need you so badly, you just keep on hurting me even more.
I just keep persevering because of you,
And do yknow I felt really tired too.
My heart aches whenever you do something to yourself.
Maybe you won't know, but I get affected by it everytime.
Yknow even if I feel sad or troubled or whatever, you will be the last one to know now,
Cause I dont want you to worry for me/even bothering for me.
And still, If I'm upset/troubled/whatever, I will still force a smile infront of you, and tell you I'm alright, Everything is alright.
Cause I know deep down inside, nothing means more important than you to me now.
And I bet you fucking don't bother, and don't care.
I didnt want to go ytd as I don't want to let it affect your mood, and there's still val and sofea.
I swear, and I trust they will make you feel happy too.
But I guess you won't understand.
Cause basically you just think that when i'm troubled, I dont want to go out to meet, what do I exactly take you guys for.
I kept on thinking everything for you, trying my utmost best to cheer you up, and to understand you though I know I'm really useless.
But you just shot me with your bullets into my heart by saying I don't understand you, and you are disappointed in me, and I've ruined your day, and you feel that you have no company which is a holiday when uh huh is going with uh huh.
Have you ever thought of how I'll actually feel when you've said all of that to me.
Cause I guess not,
Because one word of Sorry, Ai Ni, A hug, and you think its alr alright.
I'm really tired.
But I still do always loving you.

Will birthday wishes ever come true?
Cause I've alr told megumi what I want for my birthday.
I would rather want nothing at all except that you would overcome all this, and be the Delores Peck that I've once crazily knew.
I love you.
Now, I'm afraid of you.

1.05
And oh dear, where are you?
I longed for you.
Dearest Crazyman,
Please cheer up: D!

One of those nights.
8:37 PM